A Grievance Letter to the Photocopier
Dear Photocopier,
What did we do to you to make you hate us so much? We gave you a nice, cushy job. You even have your own office space. You get to hang out all day with your friend the fax machine (who, by the way, should really step up and take a better leadership role. Teach you about good service). We keep you well fed with paper and ink. We even let you go to sleep each night for a much longer period than we even get.
All we ask is that when we need a photocopy, that you deliver. Is this too much to ask? How come, whenever we are in a rush, you invariably jam for some reason. It's like you sense our impatience and wish to mock us. Why do you say "Paper Jam. Please open cover and clear paper jam." Then when we open the cover or whatever door you are telling us to look in, there is NOTHING there.
Paper size... If I put something smaller than 8 1/2 X 11 paper on your glass, why must you confirm the paper size with me? Isn't 8 1/2 X 11 the smallest paper size you can deliver? Why do you not just deliver the copy on that size paper? You know you can't deliver something smaller so why do you ask? You don't ask this question when I put the normal size item on it. Photocopier, rest assured, I will tell you when I want the business card copied onto 11 X 17. You needn't worry yourself over it.
Lastly, when I am doing a long copy job, why do you let the print jobs butt in and mess up the entire order I was going in? The printer does not let you butt in. It clearly tells you: "Sorry copier but I'm busy. You must wait in line." Yet you let the printer walk all over you every time. Almost on purpose. I think because clearly, you hate us that much.
I hope that you will consider changing your ways.
Sincerely,
The Committee Reform Against Photocopiers (C.R.A.P.)
What did we do to you to make you hate us so much? We gave you a nice, cushy job. You even have your own office space. You get to hang out all day with your friend the fax machine (who, by the way, should really step up and take a better leadership role. Teach you about good service). We keep you well fed with paper and ink. We even let you go to sleep each night for a much longer period than we even get.
All we ask is that when we need a photocopy, that you deliver. Is this too much to ask? How come, whenever we are in a rush, you invariably jam for some reason. It's like you sense our impatience and wish to mock us. Why do you say "Paper Jam. Please open cover and clear paper jam." Then when we open the cover or whatever door you are telling us to look in, there is NOTHING there.
Paper size... If I put something smaller than 8 1/2 X 11 paper on your glass, why must you confirm the paper size with me? Isn't 8 1/2 X 11 the smallest paper size you can deliver? Why do you not just deliver the copy on that size paper? You know you can't deliver something smaller so why do you ask? You don't ask this question when I put the normal size item on it. Photocopier, rest assured, I will tell you when I want the business card copied onto 11 X 17. You needn't worry yourself over it.
Lastly, when I am doing a long copy job, why do you let the print jobs butt in and mess up the entire order I was going in? The printer does not let you butt in. It clearly tells you: "Sorry copier but I'm busy. You must wait in line." Yet you let the printer walk all over you every time. Almost on purpose. I think because clearly, you hate us that much.
I hope that you will consider changing your ways.
Sincerely,
The Committee Reform Against Photocopiers (C.R.A.P.)
posted by mmmmmm Donuts at 3/11/2006
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